Forwards and occasionally sidewards – everyday musings of life

I rarely drink, so a hangover certainly wasn’t behind the sudden bout of dizziness I woke up with this morning. Could it have been something I ate last night? I have no idea, but I was definitely lacking my usual energy as I dragged myself out of bed.

As it turns out, trying to track a tiny celluloid table tennis ball flying towards your face at high speed while feeling lightheaded is a terrible idea. After getting thoroughly whooped by my usual opponents, I decided to make a hasty retreat to save what little dignity I had left.

As I left the hall, my ever-sympathetic friends offered a helpful barrage of diagnoses. Suggestions ranged from heat exhaustion (at 4:00 AM?), tiredness (I slept like a log), food poisoning, and the classic: “There’s a nasty wee bug going around.” (I’ve already had that one, though my immune system does love picking up whatever virus happens to be trending). And, of course, someone blamed alcohol… though a lack of it seems far more accurate.

By evening, feeling slightly less dizzy, Karen and I prepared ourselves for the big event of the day—if not the decade: the eclipse.

Armed with a handmade pinhole card and our clocks synced, we stepped outside to witness this celestial marvel that had been relentlessly hyped across the news, papers, and YouTube. We were ready to be awed.

Honestly? It was only marginally more exciting than watching paint dry.

The sky dimmed slightly, and the local birds got momentarily confused and kicked off an early evening chorus—though given it was already 7:00 PM, they were only about twenty minutes ahead of schedule anyway.

Listening to the media, you’d think a solar eclipse was a triumphant feat of human engineering. It’s basic astrophysics. It happens on a completely predictable schedule, and it’s entirely inevitable.

The only genuinely unexpected occurrence was spotting a young hedgehog shuffling through the garden. I’m sure the news cycle would claim it was disoriented by the artificial twilight. Rubbish. It was still bright daylight; the poor thing was probably just lost.

I’d have been far more impressed if the eclipse had cured my dizziness.